I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
There's always time for handjobs
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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