I look better un-naked...
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Randomize
