I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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