Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
I think my moral compass just broke
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize