Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
