is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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