hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize