I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I just forgot I was standing up.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
