I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
