I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Hippo gnu deer
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
