so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Randomize
