I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
