Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
