They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize