i don't like sucking hair
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Randomize
