i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize