summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
