I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
