Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Randomize
