I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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