I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize