He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
