singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
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