did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
