I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
