I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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