Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
