Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
