I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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