Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
