Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize