whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
