dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
It was a blind-side dick pic.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
