Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
