I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
