if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
We left an ass print on the piano.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Congratulations! We have a period
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