I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize