Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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