how can u be prego again
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Randomize
