If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Betty ford says i'm here all night
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize
