dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
