I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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