He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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