So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Randomize
