last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Randomize
