Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
