last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
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