i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
