I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
