I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
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